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Writer's pictureEric Kaufmann

This Holiday Season, Put Yourself First (3 Tips)

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Hi Friends,


Does anyone else find it odd that the holidays are supposed to be a time of joy, but often turn into a whirlwind of stress?


Today, I’ll share three ways to put yourself first this holiday season.


What Causes Stress Over The Holidays?

All week, my brain felt like a snow globe being shaken way too aggressively by a child.


  • Wrapping gifts 

  • Holiday parties 

  • Planning meals

  • Keeping up with family traditions 


It felt like being pulled in every direction except the one I desired.


For years, I tried to keep up with every holiday tradition, no matter how exhausted or overwhelmed I felt. I put a lot of pressure on myself to make things perfect.


What Happens When We Put Others First?

But, by the time the holidays were over, I was so burned out I couldn’t enjoy them. I would return to work exhausted and unable to show up for my team.


Those New Year’s resolutions went out the window before I could begin. Instead, I continued to eat like it was Christmas Eve. My stress levels blasted through the roof. And the bags under my eyes looked a little scary. 


The holidays zapped my executive functions. Not a fun way to start the New Year.


Wouldn’t it be nice to actually relax during the holidays? Imagine starting the New Year with energy and motivation instead of exhaustion. 


Here’s something to keep in mind: You can’t pour from an empty cup. 


Yes, I know it’s cliché. But, it's worth repeating because taking care of yourself isn’t optional. It isn't selfish. It’s what allows us to show up for others. 


Today, I’ll share three ways to put yourself first this holiday season. Let’s dive in. 🤿



Strategy 1: Simplify Your Holiday Traditions

The perfect holiday only exists in cringy Hallmark movies and not-so-real Instagram accounts. 


Just because someone else did it, doesn’t mean you need to. We always lose the comparison game.  


Instead of trying to do it all, take a moment to reflect:


  • Which traditions bring me joy?

  • Which ones feel like obligations?


Give yourself permission to keep the traditions that make you happy, modify the ones that feel overwhelming, and let go of the rest.


For example:


  • If decorating your house feels stressful, try simplifying it with a few lights or a wreath.

  • If hosting a big dinner is too much, host a potluck or order takeout.

  • If you feel pressure to attend every holiday gathering, choose one that matters most to you.


Strategy 2: Harness The Power of “No”

We often say “yes” out of guilt or fear of disappointing others. Saying “no” is an act of self-care.


When you’re asked to take on something else, ask yourself:


  • Do I have the energy for this?

  • Will this bring me joy or fulfillment?


If the answer is “no,” communicate it clearly and kindly. You don’t have to over explain. Saying, “It means so much that you thought of me, but I’m not able to this year” works just fine.


And, when possible, delegate responsibilities. Sharing the workload can ease the pressure and make the season more enjoyable for everyone.


 

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Strategy 3: Be OK With Chaos

The holidays don’t have to be perfect to be meaningful. Letting go of the idea that everything has to look like a Hallmark movie or taste like Martha Stewart’s cooking is freeing.


Instead, create moments of calm, even on the busiest days by emphasizing the five pillars


  • Sleep: know how much you need and make this a priority 

  • Movement: short walks, stretching, or time in the gym  

  • Nutrition: drink water

  • Positive self-talk: notice when you ‘should’ on yourself  

  • Community: surround yourself with people you love  


These small acts of self-care remind you that your well-being matters, too.


Summary

When you take time for yourself, you show up as your best self for others. This holiday season, redefine what “perfect” looks like—not as doing everything, but as doing what feels right for you.


  1. Simplify your traditions 

  2. Harness the power of “no” 

  3. Be OK with chaos


I hope you have a relaxing and enjoyable holiday season. One where you put yourself first.✌️



P.S. 

Procrastination can feel like a heavyweight, holding you back from the life you want to lead.

If you’ve ever felt stuck, overwhelmed, or frustrated with putting things off, you’re not alone.


It’s the most common challenge we help our clients overcome.


That’s why I created a free mini-course, Break the Procrastination Cycle. It’s designed to help you take the first steps toward freedom from procrastination and build momentum toward your goals.


If you—or someone you care about—struggle with procrastination, this course is here to support you. You can access it for free by clicking here.



About the Author

adult executive function skills

Eric Kaufmann is a Professional Educational Therapist and Certified Executive Function Coach. He is the Co-founder of UpSkill Specialists, an online adult executive function coaching company that guides adults in overcoming disorganization, procrastination, and productivity roadblocks so they can unlock their potential. He is also the founder of Elevate Learning Solutions, an Educational Therapy practice located in San Clemente, CA, that supports neurodivergent students in becoming independent and confident.

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