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Writer's pictureEric Kaufmann

What is Having Inattentive ADHD Like?

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Hi Friends,


I want to be transparent—I don’t have my life perfectly dialed in.


Weekly I...

  • completely spacing out during a conversation with my wife

  • get distracted and need to reread the same page of a book three times

  • arrive late to physical therapy because I couldn't find my keys


Living with inattentive ADHD isn't easy. The added executive function challenges don't help. But, I've learned life doesn’t have to be a constant battle with “I’m not good enough.”


Over time, I’ve built systems to manage my ADHD and, while life isn't perfect, I am truly happy.


Today, I want to share my favorite and most commonly used strategies to manage my inattentive ADHD.


Let’s dive in. 🤿


What is Inattentive ADHD?

Inattentive ADHD is a subtype of ADHD affecting roughly 31% of people diagnosed with ADHDIt can be difficult to diagnose as there’s no outward hyperactivity.


Many people, especially women, are diagnosed with inattentive ADHD later in life. They weren't hyperactive or disruptive in school. Instead, they were described as a "daydreamer" or "lazy", and struggled to learn at the same pace as their peers.


While their hyperactive classmate was walking around the back of the classroom, they sat still while their mind jumped from one thought to the next, missing their teacher sing, "'I' before 'E' except after 'C'".


What do People With Inattentive ADHD Struggle With?

Adults with inattentive ADHD often struggle with working memory, sustained attention, and organization; all of which are executive functions. 


Everyone’s experience is different. For me, inattentive ADHD impacts my life in 5 ways: 


  1. My mind wanders during conversations 

  2. I struggle with reading comprehension 

  3. I lose things 

  4. I get distracted easily

  5. I forget appointments or important dates outside of my daily routine 


In short, my relationships, career, and finances suffer. That sucks.


Here's the good news: we can practice executive function skills to live a more organized and focused life. 


How Can I Improve My Executive Function Skills if I Have Inattentive ADHD? 


1. Conversations, Meetings, & Lectures

My mind drifts during conversations, meetings, or lectures, leaving me lost and others feeling like I don’t care. This makes my close friends upset and new friendships difficult to find. As a student, I’d zone out mid-class and miss critical points, making my notes useless.


How I Stay Present:

  • Mimic the speaker’s emotions or facial expressions.

  • Use a fidget, like spinning my wedding band, to stay engaged.


I posted a video explaining what it's like to lose focus during a conversation. It's received over 100,000 plays. Check it out on Instagram or TikTok. If you relate, leave a comment.


inattentive adhd adult
Inattentive ADHD can seriously impact our relationships.

2. Reading Comprehension

Ever realize you have no idea what you just read? That’s me, all the time. My mind wanders after a paragraph or two, and I end up rereading (or skipping the page entirely), which makes it difficult to comprehend books or directions.


Today, I read that a Disneyland ticket cost 50 cents in the 1950s. This sent my mind into wandering, to thoughts on the price of gas and housing.


How I Focus While Reading:

  • Listen to audiobooks while reading.

  • Read aloud in a soft whisper to engage more senses.


3. Losing Things

This one costs me, literally. I used to misplace things—keys, jackets, sunscreen—which made me late or ruined plans. I’ve wasted too much money and time replacing lost items.


I once left my favorite jacket on the summit of Devil’s Peak—still stings every time I think about it.


How I Keep Track of My Stuff:

  • Before leaving a place, I slow down and ask, “Do I have everything I came with?”

  • At home, I use a launch pad for my keys and wallet.


4. Getting Distracted

No surprise here. Distractions derail my productivity. Whether it’s falling into a YouTube rabbit hole or deciding now is the right time to reorganize my desk when I intended to pay bills.


While writing this, I noticed 167 notes on my phone and decided I should delete some to, "start the new year more organized".


How I Limit Distractions:


5. Forgetting Things Outside My Routine

If it’s not part of my regular schedule, there’s a good chance I’ll forget it. Appointments, birthdays, and plans with friends are at risk.


This leads to stress, missed opportunities, and guilt when I have to cancel or apologize.


Last month, I forgot to pay off my credit card bill. There goes another $100...


How I Stay on Top of Plans:

  • Set two reminders: one 24 hours before and one on the day of.

  • End each day with a quick routine that includes calendar check


 

Want to learn more about executive function coaching for adults?

We know life with ADHD isn't easy. That's what executive function coaching is for!


Schedule your no-cost inquiry meeting today. 👇

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Summary 

Managing inattentive ADHD isn't easy. It requires intentional systems, but the payoff is worth it. These strategies have helped me build trust in myself and reduce the stress that used to dominate my days.


  1. Mimic the speaker's facial expressions and body language to pay attention during conversations

  2. Listen to audiobooks to improve your attention while reading

  3. Slow down and ask yourself, “Do I have everything I came with?”

  4. Identify your super distractors and minimize them when doing focused work

  5. Set double reminders for all events not part of your weekly routine


If you think you have inattentive ADHD, the first step is to speak with your doctor. A medical professional can help you determine whether an ADHD assessment is right for you and offer guidance on the next steps.



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About the Author

adult executive function skills

Eric Kaufmann is a Professional Educational Therapist and Certified Executive Function Coach. He is the Co-founder of UpSkill Specialists, an online adult executive function coaching company that guides adults in overcoming disorganization, procrastination, and productivity roadblocks so they can unlock their potential. He is also the founder of Elevate Learning Solutions, an Educational Therapy practice located in San Clemente, CA, that supports neurodivergent students in becoming independent and confident.

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