3 Reasons Why Neurodivergent Adults Struggle With Follow Through (And What To Do About It)
Updated: Mar 20
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Hi Friend,
Ever told yourself you’d do something… and then didn’t?
Here's a perfect example from my life:
It’s Sunday afternoon, and I’m at a brewery with friends, enjoying the sunshine. My phone buzzes with a reminder: “Meal prep rice for the week.” I glance at it, take a sip of my beer, and think, Eh, I’ll do it when I get home.
Fast forward to Monday night. I finish work, exhausted, ready to cook dinner until I open the fridge and realize… I never made the rice.
Cue me, standing in my kitchen, hangry, defeated, and cursing past me for thinking I’d “just do it later.”
Sound familiar?
Why Do I Flake on My Word?
I see this all the time with my clients. They tell themselves they’ll:
Plan their week on Sunday night, but Sunday night comes and goes.
Go to the gym on Thursday, but by Thursday evening, Netflix wins.
Finally send that email, but somehow, it’s still sitting in drafts two weeks later.
At a certain point, they stop believing their word. And that lack of self-trust? It’s brutal.
It’s like having a flaky friend who constantly cancels plans—except that flaky friend is you.
And it all ties back to executive function skills like task initiation and metacognition.
3 Reasons Neurodivergent Adults Struggle With Follow Through
The three most common reasons neurodivergent adults don't follow through are tied to executive function challenges.
Your Brain Doesn’t Hold Future Tasks Well (Weak Prospective Memory)
Prospective memory is what helps us remember to do things later. ADHD brains struggle with this because there’s no automatic mental notification when it’s time to act.
Maybe you tell yourself, "I'll meal prep on Sunday." But by Monday, the thought is gone until you’re already too hungry to cook.
You Think You Have More Time (or Energy) Than You Do
This is a challenge with time blindness and estimation. You assume you’ll “have time later,” forgetting that later-you will be tired, distracted, or just over it.
This might look like planning to go to the gym after work but not factoring in post-work exhaustion. By the time you get home, it feels impossible, so you skip it.
Your Brain Avoids Uncomfortable Tasks (Emotional Dysregulation & Avoidance)
Procrastination is caused by an inability to regulate our emotions. If a task feels boring, stressful, or overwhelming, your brain naturally resists it.
If you've told yourself, "Alright, it's time to plan my week!" But become overwhelmed and anxious after looking at your to-do list so instead scroll Instagram, you know what I'm talking about.
We spend an entire module learning how to break the procrastination cycle in my live course, Adult EF Skills 101. Click the link if you're interested to learn more!
How to Follow Through When You Don't Feel Like it (4 Steps)
A client and I designed this 4 step process in a session. Keep in mind, this is what works for him (book a free coaching session using this link).
Use it as a template and make adjustments so it fits your life and your brain.
Step 1: Pick One Task That’s Been on Your To-Do List for 5+ Days
Not 10 things. Just one. Choose something simple but important, like booking an appointment, writing an email, or cleaning the sink.
Step 2: Use Parkinson’s Law: Set a Short, Fixed Deadline
Parkinson’s Law states that work expands to fill the time available. Instead of saying “I’ll do it later,” set a deadline:
“I’ll write this email in 10 minutes at 3 PM.”
“I’ll clean my kitchen in 15 minutes before dinner.”
Put it on your calendar. Treat it like an appointment. Nothing else takes priority.
Step 3: Externalize Accountability (Because future-you isn’t always reliable)
Tell someone what you’re going to do and by when.
Then, ask them to check in and commit to sending them a photo as proof when you’re done.
Step 4: Define What “Good Enough” Looks Like
Perfectionism fuels procrastination. Before you start, ask: “What does "good enough" look like?”
If the task is sending an email, “good enough” means:
It’s clear and direct.
No unnecessary overthinking.
No 12th round of edits.
Step 5: Take Action
You've defined the task, selected a start time, told someone else, and know what done looks like. Now, it's time to start.
If you're still struggling to start, check out my free course. It takes less than 30 minutes to complete and walks you through specific tools to get started immediately.
Summary
If you can’t trust your word when you say you will get something done, you’re not alone. Neurodivergent adults who procrastinate and struggle with task initiation have learned they cannot trust themselves.
But, trust is something that can be built.
Here’s how:
Choose one important task
Use Parkinson’s law to set a short deadline
Tell someone you trust when you will be done and ask them to check in on you
Define what “good enough” looks like and aim for that
No more flaking on yourself. Let’s take action. I’m with you.
In service,
Eric
P.S. Free Mini Course: Break the Procrastination Cycle
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If you, or someone you care about, struggle with procrastination, this course is here to help.
About the Author
Eric Kaufmann is a Professional Educational Therapist and Certified Executive Function Coach. He is the Co-founder of UpSkill Specialists, an online adult executive function coaching company that guides adults in overcoming disorganization, procrastination, and productivity roadblocks so they can unlock their potential. He is also the founder of Elevate Learning Solutions, an Educational Therapy practice located in San Clemente, CA, that supports neurodivergent students in becoming independent and confident.